I love the winter: Christmas fairs, gingerbread, hot wine… Gifts… about that last part, I am not that excited. I admit every time I have difficulties picking up the right present… it has to be meaningful, useful, in an affordable financial spectrum. However, I want to point out that in our rush to find the perfect gift we forget that, in fact, its main role is to help us express our love
The thing with the gifts is that they only reflect a single love language out of 5: statements, time spent together, gifts, services, and physical contact. The love language determines the way we offer and desire to receive affection. The Christmas gift for someone should be made according to his language, not our preference. For example: let’s say that you have as a primary language offering gifts, but for the other may be: quality time. It is possible that the other one appreciates more the fact that you spend an afternoon decorating the Christmas tree rather than wearing that expensive wristwatch you brought.
For me, the main languages are services and physical contact. The ideal gift on the Christmas morning would be you outside, in the cold, walking the dog at 6 in the morning and maybe when you come back to give me a warm hug
Let’s briefly explore each language:
It manifests through: appreciation statements, encouragements, politeness, kind words. You can make this person smile with a note or letter in which you expose your feelings and appreciation of him or her. Do not forget, make her/him a compliment and say thank you.
2. The time spent together
Obviously, this means doing things together: decorate the Christmas tree together, go ice skating, have a movie marathon, cook something together or attend a carol concert. If you have enough money, why don’t you go on a spontaneous trip somewhere?
People who have this way of manifesting their love usually do things for you, help you, have a strong desire to take the burden off your shoulders. The best way to show your love to them is by doing something useful: to take care of a task for them (something they do not enjoy so much doing- paying bills), clean the house, cook the dinner, etc.
4. Physical contact
Touches, comforts, hugs, kisses. This language does not have to be solely manifested in the bedroom, but simply by a pat on the back or a message.
He or she is not materialistic. For him/her a gift must not be expensive or exotic, but a way in which someone says, “You are important to me, I appreciate you.” Either you give him something he/she longed for a long time, or something symbolic … something suggests you gave it more than a thought, that you devoted time and energy.
Christmas is an ideal time to explore these languages and this knowledge, used daily will help us create more harmonious and deeper relationships with others and ourselves