Post-graduation thoughts

Our mission is neither our career nor our passion.

It can be that but it does not have to. Better said, our purpose is at a higher level of abstraction and it is the backbone upon who we should make those decisions.

Unfortunately, throughout the 15 years of formal education, we are not thought key concepts such as critical thinking, how to express ourselves properly (speech or writing), how to form a value system or how to find our purpose. Sure, maths, economy, biology etc., are important but not essential for a functional human being.

It’s like having a car (all your degrees) but you don’t know how to drive it (you lack a value system), where to go (objectives) and, most important, you don’t have gas (purpose).

You need a degree, even if you quarrel with the way the society works. It is easier to work from the “inside” to make a change, then it is from the outside. Also, you can replace the institutions, but they were created by humans and it would be more lasting and efficient if you modify the way people think. You can’t do that if they perceive you as an outcast, an outsider, someone who is not on their team. Humans by nature divide the world into “us” and “them”, you don’t want to be “them” if it is trust that you search.

You need people to trust you and your vision.

It takes courage to give up what is familiar but broken, to something unknown and full of potential. It is dangerous to cross the walls of the city into the wilderness

Budha and Jesus were outcasts by choice and no one can doubt their impact on human civilization, but there were men those who crucified The Son of God.

The reason that you are alive is that this system works as malevolent may seem to some. Culture is both tyrannical (it demands you to fit into a pattern) and both favourable towards you (you don’t die just because you get the flu and world’s information is at your fingertips, just to remind you some benefits). Like all systems, it is doomed to decay and it is your job to stop complaining about how the old views do not fit anymore and revive culture throughout your contribution. Basically, that was the primary role of a university, to prepare you to enhance culture.

You need to have a set of values. You probably heard this too often, and you say, dude, give me a break, I already have one. Do you? Write it down and justify it. What do you value? What guides you? How are you going to manifest those in your life? What happens if someone threatens them?

Values define our perception and thus what we aim at. A lack of values manifests into a foggy perspective on life. Many adopt a predefined model that does not represent their essence and wake up at 40 having a life crisis. Let the rightful principles be your guide and you will never get lost.

Objectives, lately every time I hear this world, my ears start to hurt. Yes, they are important but usually every time I hear someone talking about theirs, in the fortunate case they have some, they sound empty. Or better said, inauthentic, because are not theirs, so are not in accordance with that person’s true being, they copied them consciously but most of the time unconsciously form someone else and now repeat them as a voiceover.

Knowing what you aim for is important, and how to get there, as well. You need to have a flexible approach but a consistent view. Attention and time are not refundable and you should be cautious for what you change them.

Having a well-paid job in an insurance company is a noble goal. You have financial stability, probably a nice house and chic clothes. You afford travelling to exotic destinations twice a year and you have a nice retirement package. Do you really desire this?

Yes? Well done for figuring that one out.

No? So, you are saying that maybe you should have written that book you always fantasized about, or you would prefer living in the quiet countryside instead of the buys city-centred apartment.

Your life is yours fully, but how many of your desires are yours and how many were infused into you by culture, family or friends?

Purpose, or how I like to call it, dharma. For me, it is the spine of my soul. I had an existential crisis when I realize I could not define it. I could sense it but not properly put my finger upon it.

It is very important that you have a clear vision on this one because it dictates all your life aspects. I found mine, thank God, but I see and talk with many people that have not, and as much as I can, and if they ask, I share my experience with them hoping I helped them somehow.

I had many hours of introspection, I talked with my mentor (everybody needs one), I was fortunate to meet interesting people that inspired me and be surrounded by beautiful friends that helped me through my sluggish states.

It took me half year, for some, it takes much more, and is fine. The problem is when you find your purpose, you are obliged to fulfil it, otherwise, you’ll be lost. No joking, if you don’t answer your call once you hear it, you’ll be swallowed by the whale (Jonah’s story). To be honest, once I felt from the bottom of my soul that my drahma is to help others transform and unravel their potential I felt very inspired and burdened.

I know I have to become a better being, I know I have to learn more, I know I have to work hard, and I know that this is the thing that I must do. It is not the thing that would make me rich nor happy but it is the one that would fulfil me.

I guess it was always in me, I always felt drawn to help those who were in need and asked and I’ve been a volunteer for the past 7 years but my perception is different now that it is all more clear.

This is a picture of me and my sister from my graduation. She finished high-school this year and I, my bachelor’s degree. These are interesting times for our parents…



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Alexandra Ciausescu

Writer with the soul of a poet. I'm trying not to take myself too serious. Deeply grateful that I can share my thoughts & emotions with you.