It feels good.
You make the right decision when that feels good, when the answer to the question does not make you fell angry, anxious or sad. When I say good, that does not mean happy, but rather contmept. Think about the stillness of the sea after a storm. To be at peace with yourself.
When you decided something and you are still not very sure about it, then that is not the proper answer. When you will find the right one then, from the core of your beeing you will know that is the right thing to do.
Future college students, pay attention to this when you will make your choice.
Listen to your heart, not your brain.Emotions understood properly and combined with a trained intuition are closer to what your souls’ desire more than your neurons. Why is that relevant? Because you have this ability to rationalize everything (if I want I can give you 5 different arguments why it was a good decision to eat ice cream yesterday night, even if it totally ruined all my efforts up to that point to eat healthily). You can justify anything you want if only you want it. So, if you make a choice that does not align with your core, sure, you can find arguments why it is a good idea, but still, there will always be something there that will nag you and it will grow with time. Instead of using all that energy to justify something that you don’t think is right, why don’t harness it in the proper direction.
We are rarely aware of our body, except when we experience pain. Imagine you have a splint in your index finger, it hurts like hell. You are now aware of your finger, you are aware something is not right, so what are you going to do? Are you going to ignore it, and go on with it or are you going to remove it? If you live it there, a foreign corpse into your body, it will affect the area it is in an will produce an infection. The same thing happens with the decisions that do not fit your essence, sure you can live with them, but slowly they will poison your soul.
You don’t know what is the right path? I don’t think so. All the answers are within ourselves, but we became deaf to our own nature. There is too much background noise generated by the society, parents, friends and our different personas that we can’t feel our true essence. When was it the last time you had an honest talk with yourself? We are alone from birth to death, others are just reflections of who we are, understanding yourself is thus fundamental.
The choice will not make your life easier, probably it will get harder because almost never the right path is the short, easy one. The burden you chose to carry, for example, the degree one might choose, will have the same weight, but by adding meaning to it, you will become stronger and you will be able to carry it trough.
Real life example
I’ve seen it in my children at the debate club, I’ve seen it in my colleagues, I see it in my family. The way they make decisions. They do not make them, others do it for them and they comply. Or they make them but based on fragile values (like money).
Some feel alienated from and by their decisions. I have a colleague at the university, the past 3 years were terrible for her because she didn’t like marketing, she didn’t enjoy our courses or the interesting projects we worked on. She wanted to become an accountant, as her sister, but end up in our faculty because this was her B plan in case she wasn’t admitted to the specialization she opted in the first place. Now, for her master’s degree, she wants to apply again to accountancy and audit but because she does not have the proper training she might not be admitted, and even if she would be, she might not afford the taxes. When I asked her why she wanted to become an accountant she said she like it due to the fact that it was a stable job. Then we had a deeper conversation where I figured out that she didn’t want to become an accountant because that was her dream job but rather because she search stability and security in life and she thought she could achieve them by being an accountant. Also, accountancy was the only domain she could associate with having a stable job, and she did not explore other options, she stick with what was familiar to her, her sister’s life. Furthermore, it was not that she did not like marketing but the reason she wasn’t enjoying it was because she was always comparing it with being at the other faculty. I think that when she chose her major, she actually chose her future job, to be an accountant. But I don’t feel like she ever tried to go deeper into why she wanted that job, what needs are the ones that crave to be truly satisfied? What her soul desired for real?
The thing with deep answers is that they are abstract, your being will never tell you, become an accountant, that is your brain, your heart will tell that you need to feel loved and appreciated… but your soul is more complicated, you will know you are choosing the right path when your heart, brain and body will be aligned, as one, forming a synergy,aiming at the same point.
How do you know it is a good decision? It feels right (your mind, body, spirit and heart are align), if you still have doubts it is not the right one.